my heart hurts. no, like literally.


i've had to drink caffeine the last two days in order to get myself past "if i blink too long i'll fall asleep." (i know, right [livejournal.com profile] back_in_black?) i NEVER drink caffeine because it makes me shake and feel just awful but i had to work/school/lab it up. i won't have a day off work until tuesday, but i still have lab, school, doc appointment and spine stab #3, then the next day i have off work it's lab and school. wtf man, i just want a day where i don't have ANYTHING to do (that i'm no so ridiculously sick i can't get out of bed). i've been having serious issues with low blood pressure lately. at least i haven't totally passed out from it yet.

i haven't had a weekend off in months, even though me and the other supervisor are supposed to be trading off. so much for that. last weekend i got called in to open the store and stay for a few hours till the store manager got back from another store. this was at 6:45am after having closed the store the night before (12am). i figure, hey, a few hours won't hurt - he gets back at 11am. i'm like "sweet!" and start finishing up what i was doing. then i come up front and there's no one there but the cashier who informs me that he and the assistant manager both went home without saying a word to me. 10 hours, after having a brief few hours sleep and having been there 8 hours the night before.

today, joy of joys, is a 12 hour day. i don't think they quite realize that just because i've been having giant needles shoved into my joints and nerves of my spine that i'm not 100%. hell, i feel just a little better than i did before we started all of this, but they're trying to work me like i'm able bodied. i WISH i was able bodied! it's be awesome to tie my own shoes again.

so that's my bitchfest. i just want a day where i can sleep in as late as i want and not have to worry about being anywhere or doing anything. i don't see that happening though.
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