(no subject)

1. A random something, anything. A song lyric, an anecdote, a quote, a book recommendation, a rant or rave.
2. Tell me about something that happened to you today.
3. From reading my journal, what can you tell about me?
4. Copy this onto your own journal.

(no subject)

my back started hurting really bad today in the site of the first surgery. like crippling pain. it's been a while, but i recognized it right away...

so i popped two 5/500 tab vicodin (don't worry, i'm prescribed to it... that and every other freaking narcotic pain killer on the market). HOW THE FUCK was i ever addicted to heroin if my stomach can't even handle vicodin?!?!

i was so nausios that i just forced myself to throw up to see if it would help. it did. but dayum.... how the HELL did i shoot 3 bags of heroin a day?? that's a major freaking narcotic!

eh well, i guess i'll just have to get used to sticking my finger down my throat till i go in for the 4th surgery. i'm thinkin' i'm going to demand they do a new MRI before stabbing me again. this pain is seriously no better than it was when i started out with the surgeries... the first one was supposed to work for good... now three later.....

i'll just call my doctor tomorrow. my doctor listens to me after i bitched her out for pre-judging me because of my medical record (you know, serious drug abuse, severe mental illness... not to mention i showed up to my first appointment ever with her looking like an escaped mental patient, heh). the anesthesiologist is like "oh, you hurt? NO YOU DON'T!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" i don't want drugs, hence being clean for almost 5 years. not a big fan of narcotics... well actually i am... too big of a fan... therefor not wanting to tempt fate and, well, FIX THE GODDAMN PROBLEM. i broke my back in january, give me a break already! it's been freaking unrelenting. this whole year has all because it started out well, i swear.

oh well, time for bed. gotta be at work in 7 hours :P