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i fell asleep making dinner last night. i slept through wyl calling to be picked up from work. i slept through him being home for a while. i woke up to a massive stomach ache and a terrible dream that wyl was going to leave me.
he found a ride home. i told him i thought i left dinner in the oven. i did. he got it. it was barely salvageable. i fell back asleep.
i don't know why my body does this lately. even getting out of bed milks all the energy i have out of me. i can never sleep in, there's always something i have to be doing that interrupts my sleep. there's always something i have to be doing that makes it so i cannot fall asleep at a reasonable hour.
i also had a dream that i was locked up again, because that's how it was there. i could never sleep because there was always something i had to do, or my roomate would be blaring her radio.
i wonder who the aim girl is? i'm not allowed to know. she appears when there's trouble and now i'm not good enough. i ask but i get no response. the window is always closed before i can glance. he'd rather hand out with her than me. she must be more important. i wish i was important. i'm just a cog in the providermachine. i exist to give give give give give until there isn't anything left to give, then i flip out, get locked up, then i come back to ground zero and give give give give give give give... i feel like all i give isn't appreceated. yet i continue to give. i make life work flawlessly. i bust my ass to make sure optimal comfort is achieved. just not for me.
in my mind everyone else is more important. just look at me.
he found a ride home. i told him i thought i left dinner in the oven. i did. he got it. it was barely salvageable. i fell back asleep.
i don't know why my body does this lately. even getting out of bed milks all the energy i have out of me. i can never sleep in, there's always something i have to be doing that interrupts my sleep. there's always something i have to be doing that makes it so i cannot fall asleep at a reasonable hour.
i also had a dream that i was locked up again, because that's how it was there. i could never sleep because there was always something i had to do, or my roomate would be blaring her radio.
i wonder who the aim girl is? i'm not allowed to know. she appears when there's trouble and now i'm not good enough. i ask but i get no response. the window is always closed before i can glance. he'd rather hand out with her than me. she must be more important. i wish i was important. i'm just a cog in the providermachine. i exist to give give give give give until there isn't anything left to give, then i flip out, get locked up, then i come back to ground zero and give give give give give give give... i feel like all i give isn't appreceated. yet i continue to give. i make life work flawlessly. i bust my ass to make sure optimal comfort is achieved. just not for me.
in my mind everyone else is more important. just look at me.
